I’m not going to lie – I like an easy video game. Perhaps it’s because of the inherent writer/lover of stories that I am, but I generally like the ride way more than challenge I may recieve. Parts where I die over and over really piss me off, and can get me yelling at the computer. Normally I am an incredibly mellow person, but god damn I hate repetition. Having to do an entire game over again, rather than just the level or since the last save would no doubt make me shut off the program and delete it forever. I get enough challenge in the sports that I play and life in general, video games are supposed to be a release.
But I understand where you (and many other people, my brother for example) are coming from. It’s just a different way of thinking. Therefore, I think the option should be there, rather than it neccesarily being there.
The Escape Velocity games by Ambrosia Software are a good example, if you’ve ever played (by all means DO SO ambrosiasw.com if you haven’t). It sounds a lot like the Pirates game but you are in space instead of on the sea. If you die and have bought an escape pod, you lose everything on your ship but keep all the credits (money) you had. If you don’t have an escape pod, you’re dead entirely, but can load your save. However, when you first start up the game you have the option of checking the “Strict Play” box, which makes loading a save impossible if you die, unless you had an escape pod – better for hardcore players. The escape pod vs. lifeboat question still remains, but I can at least see in a space setting that an extremely tiny escape pod would be difficult to track or sensor, and a cloaking device or something like that would be cheap over an area as small as a closet. (we do have radar resistant stealth planes in real life, remember?)
In the game I am making, an RPG, characters come and go incredibly quickly, and you can acquire absolutely anything on your team. Because of this, the game constantly autosaves, disallowing the option to go back to a past save. So it’s very probable a lot of your characters will die – permanently. We included this for largely the same reason as what you are talking about: nobody EVER uses the “retreat” option in an RPG. Ever. We want players to actually run away from battles they think they will lose, and monsters will also run away from players. Rather than the mindless “YAR! YOU RETREAT, I HIT YOU IN BACK, THEN YOU GET AWAY! YAR!” way of retreating, the party’s distance from the creature slowly increases until the chasing creature gives up. But if they are faster than you, you’re screwed, or if they have bows.
I believe you ask an incredibly valid question here, but there is no right answer for it. It all depends on balance, and what’s most fun. Realism is not always fun.